For many people change is good, for me as well. However there are some things that are taking more time to get used to then other. For one thing I feel like I am not working, though I am caring for my grandmother and working on my shop. I have had a job since I was 14 and legal to work (my choice) before that I worked at local stables and cared for children. Now in my late twenties I am doing something I never thought I would, being a house wife, caring for and elderly family member.
Also hard to get used to in this is that while I am working at home I am the bread winner at this time as my husband has been out of work for a number of months now, being laid off from his company we moved across the country for. While I have always worked I have not been the only one in the family with an income, it makes a bit of stress on a relationship when the roles are reversed.
In some ways it makes my husband obsessed with finding a job. While I am happy that he has not fallen into a state of stagnation it makes it odd when the relationship has placed him as a head of the family, now it feels like he has had a chunk of his pride removed.
This is a common problem with people that have been out or work for some time. While many people get discouraged it is important to make sure that they feel important in the relationship. If your spouse has taken a emotional stress take time to point out all the things that they do to keep the family in order. Even if it is not money it is the labor around the home, or something else that will make them feel like they are playing their Role.
While I am not one for the conventional family roles, however I acknowledged that we are all programmed already to have the set structure. It also dose not help that for all of our relationship, even though I am the one with the collage degree and more the one full time position often in management my husband has always made the majority of our income. Now he has taken the blow as one against him rather then an effect of the economy.
These are things that I will strive to overcome each day, after all, as always life is in flux.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Friday, May 11, 2012
Small Blue Dot
As described by Carl Sagan in Pale Blue Dot our entire world (everyone and everything we have or will ever know) is merely a small pale dot. When you think of this many people are sad or feel lost in a mass of things that now seem to mean nothing.
I, on the other hand, have seen of late that there are important things to use this knowledge to accept.
I have seen families and even countries ripped apart by what we think of as all important. Yet these arguments, while affecting us, are of so little consequence in the grander scheme of things that the rest of the world may not care at all, let alone the rest of the universe. In 10 years will you care about an argument with your loved one? Will you remember? Will the discomfort of sitting down and talking about it be important to you when you think of the small dot that a probe on the outermost part of our solar system would see of us as?
For the ones that have hatred for others lifestyles and partnerships, think of how tiny those people are in the scheme of things, how little their choice is effecting your universal dot. Their life and choices are not sending our Blue orb spinning out of the Galaxy, or winking it out of existence.
For those that have been hurt by those they loved and but not been able to end the cycle, think of those billions of people on that insignificant dot. You are one of them, precious as every one of them, fragile and small. But think of the millions of other people on the planet that can care for you as you deserve, they are there to love you without the use of pain, fear, or control. They are there to treat you as you should be treated. The one that is causing your pain is not even a blip on the small dot that is your world when seen from above.
These things being acknowledged are not to make people feel as though their personal problems are not important, but to give you a perspective when you are at a point of reasoning out what to do about them. If it is a petty argument it changes nothing in the long term plan if you no longer talk with someone, but would your personal life be richer if you still had the option? If you disagree with a lifestyle why bother with arguing about it? Your words, impassioned as they may be, will be lost in the sands of time making no difference in the movement of the cosmos. So relax and ignore those things you do not wish to be involved in. For those in what seems like a hopeless painful relationship, remember that the one that causes the pain is no more than speck of dust in the galaxy and will burn out in so short a time that they are insignificant to the outside onlooker. However there are millions of others out there that will or do love you in a way that you deserve whether you know it or not.
So personally I am going to stretch out only tiny section of this Pale Blue Dot, and revel in all it has to offer. I am going to try to remember when others make me mad that this moment too will pass and be forgotten, and instead try to enjoy my time here.
I, on the other hand, have seen of late that there are important things to use this knowledge to accept.
I have seen families and even countries ripped apart by what we think of as all important. Yet these arguments, while affecting us, are of so little consequence in the grander scheme of things that the rest of the world may not care at all, let alone the rest of the universe. In 10 years will you care about an argument with your loved one? Will you remember? Will the discomfort of sitting down and talking about it be important to you when you think of the small dot that a probe on the outermost part of our solar system would see of us as?
For the ones that have hatred for others lifestyles and partnerships, think of how tiny those people are in the scheme of things, how little their choice is effecting your universal dot. Their life and choices are not sending our Blue orb spinning out of the Galaxy, or winking it out of existence.
For those that have been hurt by those they loved and but not been able to end the cycle, think of those billions of people on that insignificant dot. You are one of them, precious as every one of them, fragile and small. But think of the millions of other people on the planet that can care for you as you deserve, they are there to love you without the use of pain, fear, or control. They are there to treat you as you should be treated. The one that is causing your pain is not even a blip on the small dot that is your world when seen from above.
These things being acknowledged are not to make people feel as though their personal problems are not important, but to give you a perspective when you are at a point of reasoning out what to do about them. If it is a petty argument it changes nothing in the long term plan if you no longer talk with someone, but would your personal life be richer if you still had the option? If you disagree with a lifestyle why bother with arguing about it? Your words, impassioned as they may be, will be lost in the sands of time making no difference in the movement of the cosmos. So relax and ignore those things you do not wish to be involved in. For those in what seems like a hopeless painful relationship, remember that the one that causes the pain is no more than speck of dust in the galaxy and will burn out in so short a time that they are insignificant to the outside onlooker. However there are millions of others out there that will or do love you in a way that you deserve whether you know it or not.
So personally I am going to stretch out only tiny section of this Pale Blue Dot, and revel in all it has to offer. I am going to try to remember when others make me mad that this moment too will pass and be forgotten, and instead try to enjoy my time here.
Monday, May 7, 2012
Family of 3+
No I am not expecting, though I wish I could say otherwise. My Grandmother has now been with us for over a week, and our life is starting to settle back into a routine. It is a change from our former life, but for the better.
Things that I have taken for granted in the past are now coming to light, and I find myself in a new role in life.
My husband is not sure yet how to take the new Domestic me, as I am not one for enjoying house work, however find myself rushing to every dropped item (like a new mother) to keep ahead of my grandmother trying to clean, against the doctors orders.
However I find that I also enjoy having the conversations, as my husband and I seem to always be in sync and need little conversation to get through the day together.
The idea of 3+ is funny as well as it is the part that I enjoy the most. While house cleaning is always something I think of as a for of torture, I love having people over and gatherings. With our situation as it is I find that we get the chance to have people over a lot more, to visit Granny, and see family. I suppose it is a aspect of living away from family for 10 years, and in small apartments with no place to have people over often.
I find that these aspects are things that I would like to see continue in my Future. My companies true relaunch will be in a month, and I am exited to see the outcome of every one's reaction for products.
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